Talkin Trash With HAE
A Half Ass Expeditions Glossary

“We don’t need no stinking alphabet”

Kangie–the road through the southern Whites: Kangamangus Highway
Bigtop–the four man Mountainsmith “tee-pee style” tent
Box of Death–A fire built like a chimney that burns hot and large!
Fat Foam–big ass hunk of insulating foam to keep your ass off the snow.
Geologic Survey Map–a piece of paper Vincentoli uses quite often during arguments.
The Gears of Industry–The HAE Wilderness Clearcutting Show
Bacon Stripe–You’ll find that in your underwear after a few days campin’.
Chuff–cut trail in deep snow.
Jeep Trail–the easy way up a mountain.
Particulate Matter–chunks in the water. “Does it particularly matter….?”
White Trash Night–last night in the woods, all consumables front and center!
Mt. Washington–a big , hiker killing rock in the White Mountains.
Gomers–flatlanders, joeys, greenhorns, backwoods rookies, newbs; should stay home!
Trailer Chow–The same white trash gourmet cuisine that is commonly washed down with copious quantities of alcoholic fluids among the toothless population of backwoods denizens.
Electric(ly)–with the aid of a flashlight.
New Jersey–Trash, wrappers, spills or unsightly mishaps that spoil the normally pristine wilderness.
Giardia Soup–Water with questionable purity. Beaver piss.
NACITS–(say “knack-its”) Not A Cloud In The Sky
Mr. Survival–A wilderness survival role model, the backwoods inspiration, used as a camp compliment.
Peanut Gallery–unsolicited comments.

Big A–Double AA batteries.
Thwam Thwacker–an old tent pole used to introduce oxygen into a fire. Also causes hyperventilation.
Haebar–(pronounced haybar), the official smoke of HAE.
Fred Astaire–fancy footwoork for recovery of a fall, an elaborate stagger.
Great White North–….Eh…, where we go …eh…?
Unsurvival Like–blatent disregard for a survival situation.
Tukerman’s Ravine–prime NH death zone, upside of Mt Washington
Ham-And-Eggers–see Gomers
Caveman Man–Acting like or using primitive man technique or technology.
Brown Bomb–Vincentoli’s less than adequate vehicle.
High Impact Camping–hacking and cutting your way to a higher standard at the expense of wildlife and habitat.
IOD–Implements of Destruction, tools that assist in the reduction of the forest; brush axe, saw, thwam thwacker…
Live Stream–taking a leak.
Bake Sack–backwoods cooking aid.
Tree Booming–frozen trees cracking in the intense cold.
Camp Sprawl–what you get when you take all of your gear out of you pack.
Ed Gein–an excellent hacking tool for cutting ice holes and splitting wood for the stove.
ICs–instantly consumables (like gorp or Powerbars)
Norm Abrams–a hiker who spends a half hour making a stool.
Angel Dust Cut with Formaldehyde–Powerdered drink mix and booze.
Bottle of Doom–the container for powerful alcoholic fluids.
Wilderness–out of sight of a MacDonalds or Burger King.